Not a Prank
by BreathtakinglyMundane
Summary: An AU one-shot in which Phil and Melinda are Skye's parents. Set around and before her birth.


**AN: This story simply took a hold of me and wouldn't let go. Hope you enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: I definitely do not own MAoS or it's wonderful characters.**

* * *

"Melinda," Phil called out as he opened the door of their apartment, excited to show her the beautiful crystal mobile he'd bought for the baby. He'd been increasingly drawn to baby stores; like a moth to that fatal light. Every time he saw baby things these days it was a constant struggle, _one he usually lost, _to resist the urge to buy it.

Melinda usually shook her head, laughing and smiling as he told her about how he simply couldn't resist getting this stuffed animal or that blanket because it was the most adorable thing ever.

Lately however, she had begun to complain that they would have no more space by the time the baby came, at the rate he was buying things. She still kissed him though and fawned over whatever he'd brought; sometimes becoming misty eyed with a faraway expression on her face as she rubbed her belly.

He imagined she was envisioning what the baby would do with it or look like in it.

"I've got the most beautiful…" he started but stopped a feeling of apprehension washing over him as he took in the darkening apartment. It was too… quiet.

Melinda's pregnancy had seen her pranks grow more elaborately terrifying and he was glad that she was nearing the eighth month of her pregnancy; maybe she'd simply be too exhausted to pull the elaborate pranks off anymore.

The last time he had found a puddle by the bathroom door. Thinking that the water might be coming from above he'd moved the ceiling board only to have a bucket of water tip down on him.

The worst part had come when he took the shirt Melinda had offered him. It was only ten minutes later when Melinda had gotten over her first bout of laughter that he felt a burning sensation followed by intense itchiness all over his skin where the shirt had come into contact with it.

He was definitely being extra cautious now.

He saw a puddle in the kitchen and he was immediately concerned. Melinda never used the same gag twice; she was so brilliantly creative she simply didn't need to. On the other hand maybe he was underestimating her.

"Melinda if this is another prank, I'm not going to fall for it," he called out as he moved in the opposite direction of the kitchen, down the hall to their bedroom.

The scene that greeted him when he opened the door chilled him immediately.

* * *

Melinda was becoming quite frustrated with the limitations placed on her and as a result Phil was bearing the brunt of said frustrations. She'd been ordered to desk duty since she'd become too big for field work. She hadn't wanted to let S.H.I.E.L.D. know about her pregnancy and despite Phil pleas otherwise; _he really, __**really**__ wanted to share the good news, _he'd respected her wishes.

The agency found out when every other person in the world found out… when she started to show.

Even that had now been reduced to half day. She'd had a scare in the middle of her sixth month; she'd passed out in the cafeteria. It was preeclampsia the doctor had said.

The doctor hadn't been happy about her insisting on going back to work until she promised to take it easier. However when it happened again at the beginning of her seventh month only a promise to work half days had placated him enough to hold off on the recommendation for full bed rest.

She understood that this was all for the good of the baby but having lived such an active life as a field agent, she was slowly going out of her mind. Her only outlet was to focus her excess energies on pranking her husband. _Poor Phil_ she often thought but simply couldn't bring herself to stop. He was such an easy target and the thrill she got every time he fell for it, as her schemes got grander, was as addictive as any narcotic.

So when the contractions had started towards the afternoon she was convinced it was nothing. She decided to wait it out besides she was only in her seventh month; also if she told Phil he'd just totally overreact and get so worried. So she kept quiet and went home trying to keep her mind off the ever increasing pain.

She'd been in the middle of starting dinner when she'd felt the warm rush of water down her legs and immediately known that whatever was happening was serious. Their baby had decided on an early appearance. She had left her purse in the bedroom and the detachable handset for the phone was there too.

She'd gotten to the bed when a sharp contraction had left her breathless. She had to steady herself against the bed and focus on the breathing techniques the Lamaze classes and Tai Chi had instilled in her.

That's when she'd heard Phil come in. She was about to call out to him when another one hit and the hand that had been clenching her belly joined the other on the bed helping keep her on her feet.

His fear that this was another prank brought a slight smirk to her lips as she regained her breathing. She heard him coming down the hallway and turned her head to look at him.

* * *

Phil stared at the blood forming rivulets on Melinda's legs and his blood ran cold for a second. _It's too _early he thought. Clearly this was not a prank. He couldn't find his voice to save his life as his brain ran through all he needed to do.

"Phil," Melinda breathed out her voice strained as she reached an arm out to him, "she's coming and it's too early." Phil scowled a bit but was immediately beside Melinda, helping her to the bathroom. He set her on the edge of the tub then planted a kiss on her mouth; brief, chaste but reassuring.

"It'll be okay sweetheart." Then he was up and looking for the bag she had packed for this day; no one could ever claim she wasn't prepared for whatever might come.

She smiled at his scowl knowing it was because she'd called the baby a girl. They'd gone back and forth for the past three months on the sex of the baby; agreeing not to find out from the gynaecologist. Melinda was convinced it was a girl but Phil didn't want to believe it ever since he'd gotten the cutest Captain America onesie.

"She can still wear the one…" Melinda began as she was removing her skirt. Once she saw the blood she could feel real panic start to flood her veins. From when she had realised that the baby was coming early she'd been slightly panicked but her training from S.H.I. . was the only thing helping her keep it together.

The blood was another thing and real terror filled her heart for her baby girl.

"Honey I think we're going to have to hurry," she called out to him as another contraction hit her. He appeared just then with fresh underwear and the comfy sweats she'd become addicted to as she got heavier. He clasps her hands through it whispering soothing words to her.

"Everything will be alright, I'm sure of it," he says looking deep into her eyes trying to tamp down his own fears.

She sucked in a shaky breath and quickly pulled her skirt down the rest of the way together with her underwear reaching for the fresh pair he brought with a pad already on it and she felt like she couldn't love him anymore than she did in that moment.

Phil knows it'll be faster if he drives them but can't help the conflicted feelings within him; one side wanting to sit with her, his full attention on her and the other wanting to get them as quickly as possible to the hospital.

"Drive Phil, we don't have the time, I'll be alright for a few minut_" she starts but is cut off by another contraction.

He carries her to the elevator, even though she's seven months along, she's still incredibly light and they reach the car quickly. She insists on sitting in the passenger seat next to him, refusing to be the cliché pregnant woman in the back of a car.

Melinda feels the tight grip that fear had taken hold of her heart loosen when the doctor confirms that there's nothing wrong with the baby despite all the blood and the of course being almost two months early.

* * *

Two hours later Phil is relieved when Skye Anne Coulson finally makes her appearance.

Phil had been in a lot of sticky situations, had his share of close shaves but none of them could possibly compare to Melinda Coulson in labour. She'd threatened his life in so many colourful ways that the poor doctor had actually blushed that one time he'd come to check on her when she was about nine centimetres dilated.

She'd vowed that he would never touch her again. He was such a pig, how could he do this to her?

He'd still gotten up on the bed behind her when she started pushing; rubbing her back, whispering encouragements to her and offering his support when it became hard for her to sit upright anymore.

Tears come to their eyes when the howling bundle is placed in Melinda's arms. Phil is slightly surprised that the surge of love he feels for his daughter doesn't manifest physically, like a bright light or something.

"I love you Melinda," he says as he presses a kiss to her temple, lightly rubbing the baby's head, "you did it."

"We did it," she corrects looking up at him and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. "I love you too Phil."

Skye is nestled in Melinda's arms slowly falling back to sleep as she concludes her first feed. Melinda draws a finger down her pink cheek and looks up at Phil a classic I-told-you-so smirk in gracing her face.

"Fine you were right," he sighs then captures her lips in a light but passionate kiss. "I must admit I'm glad you were," he says looking down at his daughter, "she's just as beautiful as you," he says with awe in his voice.

"I think we should have another one," she says so lowly he would have thought he'd imagined it if he hadn't seen the glint in her eyes when he looked down at her.

"B-but you just… I thought you didn't… Are you… Is this…" he keeps trying but fails to make a complete statement.

"Not tomorrow," she reassures him, "but maybe you could get another Captain America onesie for him."

His eyes nearly pop out of his head, "well we can definitely start trying as soon as possible then."

**AN: Please let me know what you think.**


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